Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Want vs. Need

Oh how we want the best for ourselves, our families, our friends. But do we know what the true NEED behind the want is? What are we trying to achieve? I have had a hard time with this reality here lately. With my lil' monkey turning 3 I have been dying to change her "nursery" into a big girl room. This of course comes on the heals of her finally climbing out of her crib. OH GRACIOUS you say? Yeah I would say the same thing and I have said that to friends that keep their kids in cribs past 2. Now I realize....the longer you can contain them...the more sleep you get!

I went on my want vs. need journey is trying to find exactly what I wanted to make her room "big girl" style. At first I wanted a storage platform bed and a matching dresser. then I found this over the top castle bed (every girl's dream but definitely beyond my Dave Ramsey budget). Then I found a dollhouse bed and matching dresser. I was SOLD!!! Then I got the most amazing deal I had to turn down. The set sells for just under $4000. I could have gotten it for $1200....I was crushed. Our budget for her entire room isnt supposed to be over $400. I cried. It is definitely what I want for my child but trying to be the grown up I claim to be I needed to realize it isnt what SHE NEEDS!!! She just wants to be a big girl. She just wants to use her tinkerbell sheets. She just wants to sleep in a bed like her brother's.....It was MY want that was getting in the way of all this.

Today, I found my need. I love antique's and I wanted her (originally) to have a cute modernly antique style of furniture if that makes sense...I think most call it Shabby Chic! While looking on craigslist I found it all.....well everything but the bed. Plenty of dresser space, plenty of room for toys and books, and a mirror that oddly enough looks like a crown! Just in time since her birthday is Sunday. She saw it and went to screaming "ITS MY BIG GIRL ROOM"

Looking back I can see God all over this...what a lesson!!! How often do we THINK we know what we want? How often do we strive for that goal just to realize it was never a realistic option for our lives? God knows best doesn't He? He gently guides us from that we "think" is best and shows us His way....and it's ALWAYS better. Are you dealing with something you "want" right now? Ask God if it is what you NEED and see if He might know a better way for your life. You never know what opportunity my arise when you sit back and wait on the Lord.

Jesus said, "I am the vine, ye are the branches: he that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit: for without [separately, apart from] me ye can do nothing" (John 15:5)

Sunday, April 17, 2011

What is my gift?

Have you ever wondered what your gift in life is? what were you put here to do? I have been struggling with this lately. I look at all the amazing women in my life. There is the singer, the homeschooler, the craftmaker, the decorator, the beauty queen, the sweet spirit, the homemaker. they are all so perfect in what they do. having amazing people like that in one's life can make a person, that isn't comfortable in their own skin, a little insecure.

We have had a lot of emotional ups and downs here lately and I almost feel like i have lost my niche. I stopped being the "know it all" and just started trying to relate. I stopped trying to always be right and just started trying to be an accountability partner for friends that need or ask for it. I have been working really hard to be a better me but in striving for that goal I never realized it meant that I was going to lose the person I was and possibly having to find who it is that God means for me to become. I have been in a full blown identity crisis and I didn't even realize it. I have just been coasting.

Today, in sunday school, we were talking about the stress of discontentment and what it really means to be content. I was soaking it up. I never knew that my passion for something new or better didn't mean i wasnt content. I have to admit i would get frustrated because I thought I wasnt content and I know God wants us to find contentment in our lives and seek Him. I thought I had failed miserably. I was so glad to learn today that it wasnt all bad. So now....what do I do?

First of all I went to my husband. I told him that I didnt know what my gift was. What is my place in life!?!?! What was his answer? The curse word : Super Mom!!!! Oh no! My heart dropped....have I acheived NOTHING? when I think of a supermom now I see a lean woman with perfect hair and makeup in a beautiful cheetah print super suit with a fabulous hot pink super cape blowing in the wind. In one hand she holds the leashes tied around her childrens waists and in the other she holds her home. Its all a perfectly presented package and she isnt shaken because she refuses for people to see that she may only be skin deep.

My sweet husband explained to me I parent our children in a Godly manner, that i do what is best for them no matter what the cost to my social life. He told me that I make him rise to a level of parenthood that may not appeal to him but that is undoubtably an unselfish level that makes a parenting a priority as it should be. He went on to tell me how I have become this manager of life, love, activity, balance, and peace in our family. And he taught me a very valuable lesson. Supermom does NOT equal Super Mom!!!! You can't be a Supermom and an Abiding mom but you can be a Super MOM and an Abiding Mom!!! It's amazing what a little conversation on the way home from church can do for ya!!